We’re issuing a call to arms… and enlisting those amongst the LonerBoner ranks to  vehemently call “Bullshit!” on deluded idiots that think Twitter and Facebook ctrl-v link slathering  somehow entitles them to “folk hero” status.

Case in point is the ludicrous claims by former Late Nate presence Conan O’Brien, that his control of social media has branded him some sort of come-back kid. Anyone watching his “live” YouTube stream on 11/1 saw amazing tweets such as “#conanshowzero watching www.youtube.com/teamcoco” repeated ad nauseam.

Now, a cornerstone of this site is our on-going critique of the hyperbole surrounding social media (ie: HATEBOMB: Twitter). However,  most of this is transparently generated claims by 40-something “youths,” that ride around on razor scooters and milk corporate marketing dollars by furthering Twitter/Facebook myths. But it seems like now, in the year 2010, there’s just down right stupidity out there that needs name-checking.

Aside from all the “using Twitter to engage kids” nonsense, this Conan O’Brien thing is just idiotic. Let’s consider his mastery of new media – in punking his  “Show Zero” YouTube audience with purposely unfunny “comedy” that NY Magazine said sadly recalls Saturday Night Live, “in that it was a single joke ill-advisedly prolonged.”

Not to mention – Conan was never fired by NBC. He just quit, rather than be pushed back :30 mins. And now, TBS late night host George Lopez is pushed back to 12am to make room for Conan. Which apparently is no longer a big insult?

The whole thing makes no sense – on any level. Furthermore – someone needs to explain to us how the following three things are so fucked up as well and escaping widespread critique.

#3 – Office Coffee

About 100 years ago, someone put drip coffee machines in the office and IT WORKED. Everyone was happy. Now in 2010, we need to have hi-tech single-serving coffee packets that are mixed and dispensed from some automated machine. This coffee sucks, and the machine looks pricey, yet it has somehow replaced drip coffee. Morons have multiplied in such numbers that now companies like Nespresso have enlisted the likes of George Clooney to hawk a home version.

#2 – “3D”

It used to be you saw some Andre De Toth 3D picture like “House of Wax” and the stuff would come out at you! Literally. That’s the whole idea of 3D movies, that things appear to come off the screen towards the audience. Or at least, that used to be the definition. Now $17 dollars buys you a ticket to see “3D” where images go from the screen backwards – looking like the screen has more depth. That sucks. Reminds us that De Toth has that great quote about Hollywood being “a whorehouse for robots.” We have no idea what that means, but Svedka stole that idea.

#1 – Porn In General

It used to be you could read Playboy for the articles, nowadays the Playboy cache rings truer with seeing the ubiquitous presence of Jenny McCarthy hawking mommy books on daytime TV. And video porn went from Belle du Jour improvements like “V: The Hot One” to giving the audience supposedly what they want – in the form of sterile, repetitive scenarios that seems like watching naked workout videos.

If only there was more cynicism in the world, maybe we could somehow keep this HG Wells predicted societal regression to morons in check. To quote Morrissey – “VIVA HATE!”

Tags: 3D, coffee, Conan, Cynacism, Facebook, Twitter, YouTube
Posted in: General