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Absolut Crap

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Zooey Deschanel

Kate Beckinsale

Internal notes from a TBWA \ Chiat \ Day, USA  development meeting for the Drinks, Absolut Vodka campaign.

Mark Figliulo, CCO TBWA: “Our Creative Director, Rob Baird, has a great idea. How about we take two actresses, known exclusively for their sex-appeal… And subvert that, by shooting them to look like David LaChapelle transsexuals? We can dress up the sets in some plastic pastiche of everything South Beach, Palm Springs, vintage modern. You know… Plus, we just heard that we can get the director of that terrible Duran Duran video, Electric Barbarella, to essentially photograph this as another homage to that Jane Fonda flick, but this time three generations removed. It’s like everything hipsters love – retro, irony, music videos, indie film babes – all put into one package. Forget “metrosexual,” the new thing is “homosexual… being from the 9o’s… and liking fancy and fruity cocktails.” That sums up who’ll see this ad on Lafayette Street.”

Tim Murphy, VP Marketing Absolut: “Well, as we sell a luxury product that ironically has no taste, smell, color or any distinguishing factors… You know, it’s all up to marketing. That said, we want to do a really big push in the cutting edge world of print, especially lad magazines. So we’re going to defer to your expertise in reaching the youth of today.”

UPDATE: It was reported, on December 7th that Rob Baird “quit” TBWA, with no idea what his next move is. He just decided it was time to leave and figure out what to do next – of his own volition, of course.

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